Closet Narcissist Definition



Closet narcissists are people who possess narcissistic qualities, but keep them hidden from view. They may appear to have all the trappings of a successful, confident individual, but their true selves remain hidden away and unexpressed. Closet narcissists often come off as humble, charming, and amiable, but under the surface they are actually quite fragile and lack self-esteem. Though they put on a good show, their true motives are often shrouded in mystery.

What exactly is a closet narcissist? The term “closet narcissist” was first coined by psychotherapist Dr. Joseph Burgo in his book The Narcissist You Know. According to Burgo, a closet narcissist is an individual who has an exaggerated sense of self-importance, yet conceals this trait from the outside world. Closet narcissists often project an image of success and confidence, but deep down they feel inadequate and insecure. They crave recognition and admiration, but are too afraid to express their true feelings. As a result, they struggle to build meaningful relationships and often become obsessed with gaining approval from others.

Closet narcissists are master manipulators, able to twist situations and people to their advantage. They tend to be extremely sensitive to criticism and avoid confrontation at all costs. Instead, they rely on subtle tactics such as guilt trips, passive aggression, and emotional blackmail to get their way. They may also engage in gaslighting, a manipulative tactic that involves manipulating someone into doubting their own reality.

Closet narcissists are notoriously difficult to spot. They often come off as strong, confident, and accomplished individuals, while quietly harboring feelings of insecurity and inferiority. As a result, many people are unaware that they are dealing with a closet narcissist until it is too late. To make matters worse, closet narcissists are not always willing to seek help – they may deny the problem or be too proud to ask for assistance.

The good news is that closet narcissists can be treated. With the right support, they can learn to recognize and manage their narcissistic traits, eventually becoming more emotionally balanced and confident in themselves. It is important to remember, however, that treatment is a long process that requires patience and understanding.


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